The Allen Almanac

I meant to write something about this post when I first read it but never got to it. By now a lot of people have read it and commented on it so I don’t really feel like getting into a discussion of the original post. But I do want to write about a follow-up post the author, Biting Beaver, has written. First, you need to read the above link and get up to speed. This is a short excerpt from the end, but you have to read the whole thing to understand just how discriminated against she was:

Folks, the condom broke Friday night and I searched all weekend for someone who could prescribe me EC. It is now Monday and I have to report that I have been unable to find anyone who will write me a fucking prescription for EC. None of the hospitals in the surrounding counties would write it for me. I stopped my search at about 100 miles from my home because my telephone book wouldn’t take me out any further than that.

I have been asked about my sexual practices. Whether I’m ‘monogamous’ or ‘in a relationship’ if I’m married, if I have kids, how many kids I have, if I was raped or ‘traumatized’ but there wasn’t’ ONE question about my health. Not one. The few places that said that they had a doctor who would occasionally write prescriptions for EC told me that I had to ask for that doctor specifically and then they proceeded to tell me that I would be ‘interviewed’ to see if I meet that doctors ‘criteria’ and then they proceeded to ask me all the above questions before telling me that I should ‘try anyway’ and I ‘might be able to talk him into it’.

Unwilling to go to the ER and be shamed and ‘interviewed’ for my ‘criteria’ before being told that I’m too slutty or too something or other I broke into a sobbing heap of anger and fear and I did the only thing I could think of doing. Dubhe and I went out to the local pet shop and played with the puppies for awhile before getting a bite to eat. Then I came home and drank a bottle of wine, smoked like a fiend and downed butter rum shots until I fell asleep.

Well, now she is pregnant and receiving death threats. (Pro-life death threats?) The thing is, this stuff isn’t even all that shocking. It is all about what you would expect.

Since the start of this I have been told repeatedly that I didn’t deserve to live. I had a commenter tell me that if they ever met me they would rape me repeatedly before torturing me and murdering me in the most painful way they could (no, they didn’t tell me exactly how they planned to do this, I guess that they wanted me to leave it up to my own imagination).

I have been called a ‘filthy cum drinking whore who should do everyone a favor and stop breathing’. I have had emails sent to me in the guise of having helpful tips to cause a miscarriage but which really suggested lethal herbs. I have been given death threats, I have been called a murderer and I can’t even count the number of times I’ve been called a whore or a slut.

First off, she should turn in the emails suggesting lethal herbs to the FBI. That should be attempted homicide. I used to be “pro-life” back during my church-going days. And while I know that most of the pro-life people are not such horrible people as to actually send her one of these messages, there are a lot that did. And I know there were many more out there who were thinking similar thoughts.

Here is my current position on the issue (subject to change): Women should have the choice of whether or not they are ready to have a child. No one is in a better position to understand that than the woman.

Biologically, sex does lead to pregnancy which leads to childbirth. But we do so many things to our bodies already that go against biology, that it is impossible to accept the idea that having sex means that you have to accept that you may have a baby. That position leads to a complete rejection of all medicine and technology in all areas of our lives. It reduces us, or at least women, into nothing more than animals. Which is a position I actually do agree with, but most anti-abortion advocates would scoff at it.

I give the argument that fetuses are humans too more weight, but it isn’t convincing to me either. They obviously are humans and do have certain rights. But so is the mother. And the sentient, breathing humans whose only crime is being an incubator for another should not have their rights tossed away. No breathing person has the right to force someone else to give up nine months of their brief life to go through a dangerous transformation. If the only way my neighbor can survive is if I donate a kidney, is anyone of the opinion I should be forced to by the law? Why should we give the unborn more rights than we have?

The argument of intent seems to do nothing more than undermine the anti-abortion movement. If an unborn child has a right to life, then what difference do rape and incest make? (I realize there are pro-lifers who argue this, but it is mostly the fringe in my experience.) What makes those children less worthy of their lives than one conceived during a one night stand? It is a position of moral relativism, something most right wingers claim to stand against. If you are going to allow or outlaw abortion, you have to allow or outlaw it regardless of the circumstances of conception. I don’t agree with the anti-abortion hardliners about much, but I at least stand with them on this fact.

So what are my limits? I think the line should be drawn at children who can survive outside the mother. I’m not a doctor, but I think that comes down to third trimesters. This will of course go down as science progresses. Perhaps, I’m doing a bit of relativism myself here, but I see a distinct difference in an abortion when the child is completely dependent on the mother’s womb and when the child would survive outside with proper care. It’s not a a perfect solution by any means, but such things rarely are. (What makes an 18 year old more mature than a 17 year 11 month old? The law.) But even still, that is a matter of my own personal taste. I do not believe that we should be making criminals out of women who have abortions, no matter the reason. De-stigmatize it and make it available easily and there would be almost no need for voluntary late term abortions.

I don’t know that any of these are particularly new arguments, but it’s what I think. Please don’t try to argue with me (yeah, right). I have no intention of changing my mind or of changing yours.

Abortions are always horrible, but that doesn’t mean that they should be illegal. We should do as much as possible to limit the number of women who need to get an abortion. But the same people who wast to outlaw abortions also want to eliminate sex ed and access to contraceptives. By what logical system does this make any sense? If the problem were abortions, then these people would be doing everything they could to educate people about sex and to provide easily accessible free contraceptives.

Of course abortions aren’t the issue. At least, not the real issue. I know that there are a lot of people out there who are just believing what they are taught. Maybe sometime I’ll write about what I think the real reasons are. (hint: misogyny)