The Allen Almanac

lolz

In honor of the return of Scrubs, here is an original song performed by JD and Turk, Guy Love.

God would like to thank you for your belief and patronage. In order to better serve your needs, (S)He asks that you take a few moments to answer the following questions:

Did you hear that Wal-Mart decided it was in their bottom line’s best interest to go back to saying Merry Christmas instead of Happy Holidays? Personally, I couldn’t care less what they say to me on the way out of the door. If Wal-Mart is where you get your spiritual fulfillment you might [...]

A stop motion battle between two friends turned enemies.

I saw this on Huffington Post:
New York - Publisher Judith Regan announced today an agreement between ReganBooks and Vice President Dick Cheney for a book he will write (with his wife) titled If I Did It: Faking the Case for War, a hypothetical account of how he would have cooked the intelligence that led to [...]

This post is in tribute to America’s former warrior-poet, Donald Rumsfeld. Enjoy the poetry stylings of America’s former Secretary of Defense. His insight will be missed:
The Unknown
As we know,
There are known knowns.
There are things we know we know.
We also know
There are known unknowns.
That is to say
We know there are some things
We do not [...]

I was looking through the terms people have searched for that have brought them to my site, and I thought I’d share a few because a lot of these are crazy and some are funny that they would link to me:

death to all muslims
please lord help me to be the kind of person my dog [...]

Some people have been talking about Bill Maher’s new rule for conservative think tanks:
A) You can’t call yourself a think tank if all your ideas are stupid. And B), if you’re someone from one of the think tanks that dreamed up the Iraq War, and who predicted that we’d be greeted as liberators, and that [...]

The Asylum Street Spankers are named for a street in Austin, Texas, that once led to the State Asylum. They’ve been called a postmodern jug band and “Hee-Haw for hipsters,” among other things. They use fiddles, resonator guitars and even a saw, one of five instruments key contributor Christina Marrs has taught herself.
Their music is [...]